16....I thought it'd be a perfect age but it's not.
I feel more insecure than I've ever felt.
I hate the faces of pretty girls as they walk by me with boys hanging at their every word.
I hate the "you're beautiful" comments every guy leaves on her pictures.
I wonder what is beauty? is it from the outside or the inside?
I don't look nor feel beautiful.
I hate myself for feeling this way.
I hate the tears that won't stop flowing.
I hate the way I feel when I think about him.
I know he doesn't like me and he will never like me but I really want to believe in my fantasy.
I want to call him a friend but I just feel like a nuisance to him even if he says I'm not.
i want to respond as soon as he texts back but I hold myself back to not show my interest in him.
I try to ignore his messages but they are all I see.
I want to cover my eyes and ears and hide.
I don't want anyone to see my tears.
I want to tell him my pain but I don't want to burden him more.
I want to talk to him nonstop but I know he doesn't.
I hate this feeling.
I want to stab myself in the heart so I can't feel anything for anyone.
I hate my insecure heart.
I hate my swaying emotions.
I just wish he'd stop talking to me so this pain I feel can go away.
I love talking to him but at the same time I hate it.
Please stop lying to me and tell me the truth....please....please....please
I hate the smile you put on my face.